There are examples of forms of adoption throughout history and in different religious and or cultural contexts. The first Adoption Act in this country was in 1926 and was introduced to clarify issues relating to property and inheritance.

The current Adoption Act was framed in 1976 and reflects adoption in very different times, characterised by the concept of secrecy in adoption. During the 1970’s around 27,000 children a year were placed for adoption, mostly infants. Despite “hippy” images of the “swinging sixties”, this was a time when having a baby outside marriage and single parenthood were not acceptable and when abortion was not readily available and this was a time when thousands of young women had little choice but to place their babies for adoption.

Adoption today is very different of course. Between 5-6000 children are currently adopted each year, about half of these within their own family. Only about 200 of the children adopted are babies.
Although regulations governing adoption have been updated, (1983, 1991 and minor more recent amendments, significantly those which place controls on the way in which children can be brought into the country for adoption) adoption law review is long overdue. There has been a process of review since the Lord Chancellor’s rolling programme of adoption law review began in 1989 – the time that the Children Act was being finalised (it was implemented in 1991). However, the process has always been overtaken by political imperatives of the day and the topical aspects of adoption have attracted high levels of media attention and less cross-party agreement.

Now, review of adoption law was in the Queen’s speech and a more recent White Paper drawn up and the Bill is going through parliament at the present time. National Standards in adoption are now in place and draft Practice Guidelines have been circulated for consultation. This is set within a much more open framework of partnership, accessibility and consultation. All of these documents and the latest information about governmental activities relating to adoption are available on the Department of Health’s website. [www.doh.gov.uk/adoption/index.htm]

Basic legal notes have been prepared by PACT’s legal adviser, and you will find them on the side menu titles ‘Legal Notes’

This is for professional’s information only. If you would like to know more about the workshops and the benefits for adopters, please contact Jane Slee via emailing info@pactcharity.org and marking it for Jane Slee’s attention.

We are delighted to be able to tell you about the 2002 dates for the series of workshops we are continuing to provide for approved adopters and adoptive parents with some experience of the issues relating to adoption.

Established adoptive families are likely to find workshops 3, 4 and 5 particularly relevant. Those of you who were unable to come to some of the workshops last year will be welcome to come this year.

It is helpful to know in advance who is able to come: please email info@pactcharity.org and mark it for the attention of Jane Slee.

The workshops will be provided by Jane Slee, Mary Elford and Lois Williams who are all PACT workers and we do hope you will be able to participate in them, as they have been designed with your best interests in mind.

There are a number of reasons why it is so important to provide these workshops:

• Experience shows us that adopters are at a different stage of learning once the stages of home study and approval are behind them and they are actively preparing for placement and becoming adoptive parents.

For those with placements or those who have now successfully adopted, questions often arise about talking to their children about adoption and in making contact arrangements.

• Demonstrating a continuing commitmenmt to learning and developing skills as adoptive parents will be a positive factor for agencies seeking to place children with you.

• As an agency we will have enhanced the information and preparation that we can provide.

• We have learned from the experiences of those who have worked with us. They have told us about the impact of all of the issues to be covered and how overwhelming they can be at times. Sadly, this does include instances when things have not worked out as we all would have hoped and we have listened to views about what might have helped or made a difference.

Details of the workshops are as follows:-

1. 21st March 2002 7.30pm –9.30pm
Waiting for a placement, linking and the introductory process

2. 20th May 2002 7.30pm-9.30pm
The first 6 months of placement and the impact on all concerned.

3. 13th July 2002 10.30am – 1.30pm this session will include a light lunch after the workshop.
A session for members of adoptive parents’ wider support network. This will give those close to you an opportunity to find out more about adoption and consider the role of wider family members and friends in supporting adoptive families. We do not expect adopters to attend this session themselves.

4. 17th September 2002 7.30pm – 9.30pm
Parenting issues and behavour management

5. 16th November 2002 10.30am – 12.30pm
Talking to children about adoption and maintaining contact with people from the child’s past.
All of the meetings will take place at the Benson Parish Centre, Benson, Oxfordshire.
We are happy to receive your ideas on subjects for discussions at these meetings. We will be running the sessions on a rolling programme over the next few years. Thus if you miss a session, there will be an opportunity to attend in the future, if you wish. The sessions will be run by PACT staff and may include some outside speakers.

We hope that you will find the meetings informative and helpful in your parenting role and give you an opportunity to meet other adoptive parents and PACT staff.
Please email info@pactcharity.org if you would like to attend any of the workshops and mark it for the attention of Jane Slee.

Dr David Brodzinsky, a professor in the U.S.A, has undertaken extensive research into how children understand adoption and offers the following framework to explain this:
Level 0: aged 0 – 4 years:
At this stage your child will show no real understanding of adoption but they will be able to pick up whether adoption is a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ thing from the way those people around them, particularly you, their adoptive family, talk about it. So do use positive language when you are talking about adoption. But it won’t be just the words your child hears but also more imperceptible attitudes which can come across in a variety of non-verbal ways. Therefore it is extremely important that you become comfortable with the use of the word ‘adoption’ and familiarise yourself with your child’s story so that you will be ready to raise the issue of adoption with your child. Talking it over with your partner or your child’s social worker will help you to work through any concerns/ anxieties that you may have about your child’s story.
Level 1: aged 4 –6 years:
At this age your child cannot really differentiate between birth and adoption as a way of joining families. Adopted children often believe that all children are born into one family and then go and live with another! They may look as though they understand that they are adopted because they can tell their own adoption story but in fact they do not fully understand it. However they may well be asked questions by and hear comments from other children. At this time it is important for you to help your child by providing them with a simple ‘cover story’ which is founded on truth but is easy to tell.
Level three: aged six to eight years:
By now your child will be able to clearly differentiate between adoption and birth as different ways of joining a family. They also accept that the adoptive family relationship is permanent but do not understand why. Brodzinsky describes how a child may be relying on the fact that their adoptive mother has told them adoption is permanent or they have some idea of possession, in that they ‘belong’ to their adoptive parents. You now need to give more concrete information to your child. However this needs to be at a level which your child can understand. As indicated above it is important for you to feel comfortable in discussing this information as any discomfort you have will be conveyed to your child who may then believe that adoption is not so positive. It is crucial that your child is able to express their feelings; they may well be having difficulty understanding their story and also (particularly the older children in this stage group) may be starting to feel a sense of loss.
Level three: aged eight to ten years
Your child can now differentiate between adoption and birth but may begin to question how permanent their relationship is with your family. Sometimes children in this age group may think that their birth parents can reclaim them or that their adoptive family may have an experience which could lead to them abandoning the child. During this stage your child will start to develop empathy for other people and this can lead to them worrying about their birth parents or indeed about you, their adoptive parents.
Your child begins to understand that both their birth parents and you have felt some loss. Brodzinsky talks about the child going through "adaptive grieving" as the child begins to make sense of their adoption at a deeper level. This may not be manifested in obvious sadness but may be expressed in changing behaviour patterns. You can help your child by enabling them to express their feelings and also help them to gain a more sophisticated understanding of their adoption – this will often mean taking the initiative by using opportunities that present themselves to look at this. It is vital that you support your child by being sensitive and patient while also accepting their feelings .
Level 4: aged 10 to 12 years
At this age your child begins to describe their adoptive family relationships in semi-legalistic terms and will talk about judges, lawyers, doctors and social workers who somehow make the parent-child relationship permanent. Your child can now explore the issues in more depth and hear with some understanding the more distressing parts of their history and the reasons for adoption. They can understand that certain facts may be of more importance than others in leading to their adoption.
Level 5: aged 12 years +
Your child can now see their adoptive family relationship as permanent. They have an understanding of the legal transfer of rights and duties from the birth parents to their adoptive parents. It may be at this stage that your child will want to find out more about their birth family and may even want to meet them. All adolescents, whether adopted or not, want to find out ‘who they are’ so please do not feel unduly alarmed about this search for identity but it may be helpful to seek some guidance from your adoption agency.
Your feelings:
You are likely to experience all sorts of feelings yourself at these different stages. Try not to bottle them up – talking to your partner or social worker will help.
Often adoptive parents can feel threatened or inadequate in some way because their child wants to talk about their birth family. Try and put yourself in your child’s shoes and respond as positively as you can.
Also don’t assume that if your child is not talking about their adoption they are not interested. Several things could be happening – they may be having difficulty making sense of what they have been told already, they may have sensed some discomfort/embarrassment on your part, they may not yet be able to put their thoughts into words or don’t know what questions to ask.
Difficult stories:
You may be very worried about talking to your child about some aspects of their story. You cannot change what has already happened to your child but you can separate the deed from the person and still value your child’s birth parents. You may find this very hard in the light of your child’s experiences but condemning the parents can give your child the message that they too are no good as they were born to these people.
At the same time it is important to be honest about the facts – use simple words that a young child can understand, filling in more detail as your child grows older. Thus if your child has been physically abused you might say “your birth mum didn’t know how to look after children and sometimes she hurt you”.
Explaining adoption to a child has been described as a bit like learning to play with Lego – small children start off with large manageable pieces of Duplo and as they develop their skills gradually progress to making very sophisticated constructions with smaller and more intricate pieces of Lego.
There are many different ways of sharing adoption with children -
Take a look at other articles we have [on the side menu] such as Life Story Books and the Book List.
We shall be adding new articles all the time, so do check the menu list from time to time.
If you would like to read more about Brodzinsky’s work, look at ‘Being adopted – The Lifelong Search for Self’ by Brodzinsky, Schechter and Heing.
(New York:Doubleday.1992)
Another very useful book is ‘Making Sense of Adoption – A Parent’s Guide’ by Lois Ruskai Melina (Harper and Rowe 1989) which has lots of ideas on talking to children about adoption.
Smcd05.02amd

Revised Code of Practice
Changes were brought in at the beginning of the year [2002] to streamline
the procedure for children to be assessed for extra help in connection with
any special educational needs they may have.
The procedure spans Early Years learning, through Primary to Secondary
education, and the stages have been reduced from 5 to 3.
The revised code:
• recognises the serious responsibilities of the SENCO – the teacher
who co-ordinates the provision for children with special
educational needs in any school.
• places stronger emphasis in involving the child in the decision
making process about their educational future.
• strengthens parental involvement and rights – there is a new right
of appeal against decisions about the educational provisions for a
child.
• reduces paperwork. A child's Individual Education Plan [IEP's] will
focus only on what will be additional to and different from the rest
of the curriculum.
The previous process of five stages has been reduced to three and cover
Early Years establishments, as well as primary and secondary schools.
Stage One: Early Years/ School Action – staff identify strategies for
assisting a child.
Stage Two: Early years/ School Action Plus – where difficulties continue and
there needs to be the involvement of outside specialist.
Stage Three: Statutory Assessment – where difficulties continue.
Progress, [presumably at each stage] is demonstrated when:
-there is a reduction in the attainment gap between an SEN child and
her/his peers
-previous rates of progress is maintained or improved.
-evidence of improved behaviour.
-achievement of an higher level of independence.
Principles Underlying the Changes:
• every child with SEN's should have their needs met.
• children with SEN's should be provided with a broad, balanced
and relevant education – usually in a mainstream setting.
• the views of the child and the parents/carers should be sought and taken into account.
continues……
Practice implications:
• parents/carers and professional should work in partnership.
• the child's view should be taken into account wherever possible, according to capabilities and maturity.
• needs to be regular review of provision and progress.
• Local Education Authorities [LEA's] should make assessment in accordance with prescribed time limits, and produce clear and specific statements.
• Individual Education Plan [IPA] to focus on 3 or 4 key targets, identifying teaching strategies, review dates and success criteria.
• needs to be a high level of co-operation between professional agencies.
Information from 'Special Children' Jan. 2002
LW April 2002
More information is available from the Department of Education web site at

http://www.dfes.gov.uk/sen/

Teaching This Equation at School and at Home

by Deborah McCurdy

"They're not your real parents!"

The little girl's words were not meant to hurt. At 8, she was struggling to understand her own adoption. But our adopted son was hearing these words for the first time, at the age of 5. And he was devastated.

For weeks, Mark could not bring himself to share the incident, nor his pain, with us. What terrible thing might happen if he did? His behavior showed he was troubled, but even when he came to our room at night complaining of monsters, he could not speak of his underlying fears.

One evening, as he lay with his head on my lap, with my hand stroking his forehead, Mark broke into sobs and burst out with his terrible discovery: "Becky says you're not my real parents!"

I hugged and reassured him. He had known for a long time that he was adopted and that this meant his "first parents" could not take care of him. He knew that we had become his "forever parents" because we were able to provide food and toys and clothes, and because we very much wanted a little boy like him. As a social worker in adoption, I had read all about "telling" and had thought that our explanations had covered all the bases.

But we had never dealt with the question of "real" parentage. It simply had not occurred to us that other children would openly assert that "forever parents" were not real parents. Yet this has happened to Mark at least three times in the years he has been in school.

Mark knows what to answer now: "Yes, they are my real parents," he will insist, "because they are the ones who are bringing me up." If the other child persists, he will say, "You're confused about that!"

It is not only the children who experience this confusion. Their parents and other adults tend to define adoption as something that happens when your "real parents" can't keep you. The problem is largely with our language, since the term "birth parents" is not yet in common parlance and it is the first parents who traditionally have been referred to as "real parents."

Of course, our language reflects the perceptions and values of past generations, and it has not caught up with our more modem concepts of adoption. I have often heard pre-adoptive parents say, 'We have two children of our own and now we' like to adopt." These parents are caught by the limitations of outdated language, which does not yet reflect their own progressive thinking and feeling. Although they may already think of the children to be adopted as their own, they can find no words besides "own" to distinguish children born to them from those they plan to adopt.

What can adoptive parents and teachers and other concerned adults do to help adopted children feel fully

a part of their families Several suggestions come to mind:

1. Work on the problem of language.

In the course of the adoption process, adoptive parents learn to say, "Sarah and John were born to us, and Maria was adopted," when they are asked which children are their own. They are urged to help their families, and the parents and teachers of their child's playmates, to avoid the use of "real parents" when talking about birth parents. I now make a point of asking new adoptive parents to tell their children before kindergarten that they are their real parents by adoption and to add that other people "may be confused about this." This needs to be gone over more than once. The point to stress to your child is that "real parents are the people who bring you up, " and that the child is your own child, by adoption.

2. Keep the birth parents' role in the past.

The first parents must be spoken of sympathetically, as adopted children need to feel pride in their origins. They need to feel that their birth parents would certainly have kept them if they could have. But they should be told they have new parents now. It is very important for adopted children to know that they are where they are meant to be – that the first parents made a loving plan for them to be with their adoptive families forever.

I believe that it is a mistake to make the birth parents too real by speaking of them frequently, or glowingly, or in great detail, when children are small. Although birth parents have their own reality, we do not want our children to worry that there are people out there who have a claim on them and may try to take them back. There are simple ways to clarify that you are the child's real parents now. Some adoptive parents refer to the birth parents by their first names, if known. Others may feel comfortable with the term "first parents," used in conjunction with "forever parents." There will be plenty of time later on to help curious older children get a clearer, more detailed understanding of their birth parents. (Adoption workers do recommend that adoptive parents try to obtain as much specific non-identifying information as possible about the birth parents and their circumstances, and that they present his information in a favorable light as the child seems ready for it..)

3. Speak positively about adoption as one good way that children come to parents.

It is best for adults not to speak of adopted children as "special" or "chosen," lest the child come to feel over the years that those adults overemphasized their differences. Every adoption is a story of pain and loss, as well as a story of fulfillment and love. Thoughtful parents speak with pride of their ado adoption and the pleasure the child has brought them. At the same time, they need to be open to hearing the child's concerns about having been given up by the birth parents. These concerns tend to surface when a child is about eight or ten, no matter how well the adoption has been handled. "Adaptive grieving" is a normal process, entailing some uncertainty and confusion and – for some children – a degree of sadness over the loss of birth parents It is important for parents to let their children know that these are normal feelings for adopted children to have, and that they will get through this time of uncertainty or sadness. If the feelings are strong and persist a long time, parents can have their child evaluated as to whether brief psychotherapy may be helpful.

Parents should realize that their child's feelings do not indicate that they are doing something wrong. Adoptive parents generally do a good job if they feel like real parents, with children who are fully their own whether or not they match them in race and color. As long as these parents are open about adoption, speak freely and naturally on the subject, and think of adoption as a truly positive alternative to childbirth, their children will learn to view their adoption with pride and should feel fully a part of their families.

How do children develop emotionally? A noted psychologist, Erik Erikson, believes emotional growth takes place in stages throughout a person’s life
As children develop, their needs and abilities change. These changes affect the kinds of experiences they have with people. Different things are important to children at different ages because:
• Their abilities change
• The specific needs they have for others change
• Their social circle changes
• The events and issues that dominate their thinking change
Erik Erikson, a psychologist who has studied the emotional development of human beings, has divided the continuous process of development into eight basic stages. He describes the five earliest stages in the following way.
1. Sense of Trust
The sense of basic trust, says Erikson, is a child’s sense that the world and the people around him or her are dependable. Infants who get consistent care from familiar, loving people, who have their needs met, grow to feel that their immediate environment is trustworthy.
“Infants who get consistent care from familiar loving people grow to feel that their immediate environment is trustworthy”
The basic feeling of trust usually develops during the first year of the child’s life. But it can be strengthened or undermined in later years. During infancy, Erikson proposes, children develop their basic view of the world as either a dependable, satisfying place or a place of pain, frustration and uncertainty. The way that people respond to the baby’s physical and emotional needs affects his or her development of a sense of trust or of mistrust. Without a sense of trust, children may have trouble with the next stage, developing a sense of autonomy.
2. Sense of Autonomy
During their second and third years of life, children’s energy centres on developing a mind and will of their own. Self-awareness is developing and the desire to do things for themselves.
Erikson says that when children do not have a chance to make their own choices, when adults are too strict in forcing them to do things, or do not let them do things they are capable of, children may lose faith in their own will. They feel ashamed or develop doubts about their abilities.
“During the second and third years of life, children are developing self-awareness and the desire to do things for themselves”
Erikson does not mean that children should make every decision: there are some choices that adults must make. A young child is not ready to decide what things are safe to play with or what foods are appropriate to eat. For example, Erikson is simply saying that children can make many choices perfectly well, and that they will be healthier if they are given the chance to do so.
During this period, children’s physical and mental abilities are growing, too. More and more occasions arise that involve a question of what they are allowed to do. They are able to toddle about and to learn to use the toilet successfully: they are beginning to understand and use language and to remember. These abilities enable young children to rule their own life more.
At the same time, adults expect more of them. As children are trying to develop more control over their world, adults are trying to direct their behaviour. Erikson maintains that if children are given some opportunities to make their own choices, without direction or control from others they will develop a sense of self-reliance – confidence in their own ability to make choices. Denied these opportunities, children have trouble learning to trust themselves or develop a sense of initiative.
3. Sense of Initiative
Sense of initiative results from a willingness to try things and the self-confidence to take risks. Around the ages of three to six, children’s curiosity, imagination and need to experiment normally have a great influence on what they do and how they view others.
According to Erikson, with healthy development, a child has a sense of autonomy (feels confident of being a person in his or her own right) and a sense of trust (feels that the world is basically a good place). At this third stage children are eager to find out what kind of person they can be. They observe others keenly. They imitate behaviour, and they experiment with how they can affect their world.
This is the age when both conscience and imagination develop – when children understand better what people expect of them and, at the same time, are inventing fantasies. Some experts hold that a child quite normally may feel guilty for having thoughts about deeds he or she imagines but never carries out. They say that this combination of a developing conscience and wide-ranging imagination explains the nightmares common to this period.
“Sense of initiative results from a willingness to try things and the self-confidence to take risks”
Children’s sense of initiative grows when they are encouraged to make plans and are given chances to carry out their ideas and to express their fantasies safely. Excessive punishment can lead to excessive guilt.
Initiative is an attitude toward the world and toward their own abilities that children must have in order to continue learning. A child who behaves “too well” may be feeling deep unexpressed guilt or may have squelched the desire to relax and try things. In such cases, a child may need help in addition to your loving and encouraging home, so be sure to ask your caseworker for advice.
Too often, the stresses in a foster child’s world upset the balance between conscience and fantasy and the need to develop initiative. The child is left feeling guilty and worthless.
4. Sense of Industry
Erikson’s fourth stage begins somewhere around six years of age and extends over the next five or six years. During this period, for most children, preoccupation with fantasy subsides. They want to be engaged in real tasks that they can complete. As with other developmental stages, seeds of this kind of interest appear much earlier. In fact, some children are trained very early to perform socially useful tasks. The exact age is not the point here. This stage begins, Erikson suggests, when the child seems to want to learn to stick to tasks, to do things well, to learn from others, and sometimes to be competitive.
“Feeling successful encourages children’s sense of self-worth and eagerness to learn more”
Adults can help children in this period by providing interesting ideas for work, both in school and at home, at the right level of challenge. Adults can also help them learn how to do things. Industry includes consciously putting problem-solving skills and language skills to work.
Feeling successful encourages children’s sense of self-worth and eagerness to learn more. But feeling defeated leads to a sense of inferiority that can discourage future learning.
5. Sense of Identity
For all adolescents the great anxiety is: What does is all add up to? What will be my place in the larger social world? This is a difficult time for everyone involved because all of the old concerns about trust of others and self, about conscience and guilt, about success and failure come up again in complicated forms. Patience, love and understanding are needed as youngsters struggle to find their own appropriate roles, values and behaviours.
“The more you can affirm the child’s uniqueness, the easier it will be for the child to develop a solid sense of self-worth”
For foster children the question “Who am I?” is a critical concern at every age, but it can be overwhelming during adolescence. The more you can affirm the child’s uniqueness as an individual, the easier it will be for the child to develop a solid sense of self-worth.

Promoting resilience in children is an optimistic and pragmatic approach based on the belief that change is possible. Used more and more by professionals, it is also of practical value for adopters and foster carers.
Children who need a new home don’t just need a permanent home, they also need qualities that will help them live their lives – “qualities which cushion a vulnerable child from the worst effects of adversity in whatever form it takes and which may help a child or young person to cope, survive and even thrive in the fact of great hurt and disadvantage.” Resilience is sometimes described as “normal development under difficult circumstances.”
Children who come into care often feel that they are not worth anything. They feel that they have no control over their circumstances and no way of making an impact on their environment. They feel helpless and powerless. Building up the resilience of children could help them form positive attachments with a variety of people and feel they can make a difference.
What can a child develop their feelings of confidence and effectiveness?
1. Having a secure base:
A child will find it easier to venture out into the wider world from a safe and loving base. One way of providing this is to build up a protective network of support for the child, through making use of all possible sources of support that could be available, for example, siblings and other relatives, neighbours, former foster carers, teachers and other school staff, club leaders and so on. In other words, it means valuing the child’s past and finding possibly small but significant ways for people to contribute to their sense of identity and worth.
2. Making school a positive experience:
For some children, school is seen, as somewhere you have to go, a place where you can mess about. Encouraging a child to look at all the opportunities provided by school, not only for learning, but for joining in activities and clubs (drama, chess, sport etc), making friends and relating to teaching and non-teaching staff, can transform their view of school. School can then become another secure base from which the child can develop self-esteem and build relationships with other children and adults.
3. Having friendships:
Being able to make friends – and the right kind of friends – and maintain these friendships will help a child feel less isolated. To do this, the child will need both skills and opportunities. Social skills can be improved: for example, by helping the child reflect on what has happened in a particular situation, by providing examples of alternative ways of doing things, by showing by example, by role playing.
Disruptions in children’s lives can make it difficult for them to sustain friendships, especially for younger children who often make friends with people close by. Later on, friendships can be more easily maintained by common interests and greater independence. School, after school and community clubs and outdoor activities can all provide a starting point. For some children – young ones obviously, but also older ones with challenging behaviour – it can be necessary to choose activities which are closely supervised by adults who can intervene in case of difficulties.
4. Taking part in valued activities:
Children with low self-esteem often find it difficult to try out a new activity. They feel they have no talents or interests. They often understand the question “What would you like to do?” as meaning “What are you good at?” and so have nothing to say. Ways round this include find out about past interests which could be revived, sharing a hobby with an adult, trying out activities as tasters, without pressure to pursue them or win, and so on. For example “One 15-year old girl wrote to Rangers Football Club and now receives their newsletters and information. Her esteem was greatly boosted by seeing that she could act on her own initiatives”. Children may feel threatened by competition so it may be helpful to try non-competitive activities.
5. Holding positive values and caring about others:
Some children will need help in understanding that positive social behaviour is linked to emotions and feelings, both their own and those of other people. This can be done by exploring situations with them to see how much they have taken in other people’s points of view, and by creating situations in which they can behave in a helpful, caring and responsible way. Lateral thinking can be valuable: for example, children could be encouraged to take an interest in nature and the environment or to care for a pet.
6. Developing social skills:
Children usually learn their social skills at home, before extending them further afield. Those who have been deprived of early warm and secure relationships may need help in developing their social skills. They often need a language to express their feelings and to learn how to relate to others, in particular, how to reflect, how to understand cause and effect, how to resolve conflicts.
Thinking in terms of resilience means that you can focus on a child’s strengths rather than their problems. In practical terms, it means that, as well as talking about their feelings, you can work on what is important to them and what they would like to try and do. This also implies having an overall, ongoing, view of them and their lives.
Boosting children’s resilience should enable them to take part in “normal” childhood activities and relate to others in a more constructive way, come to terms with their early experiences and deal more effectively with new events, and generally help them feel more in charge of their lives.
[Based on two articles which appeared in BAAF’s quarterly journal Adoption & Fostering]

When children are placed for Adoption, they are, of course at various stages of
development, and may have had no experience of formal education, or may be
transferring between Education Authorities. The following pages seek to assist Adoptive
Parents, through this very important stage.

School aged children
Every child who has attended Nursery or is of school age will have been given their own
unique education number that will stay with them throughout their formal education. It is
important that you acquire this number, and keep a note of it, since it may be necessary
to quote it if extra resources or past records are required.
During the course of introductions with your child you will have learned as much about
your child’s previous life as possible. You will have found out about the child’s emotional
history, life experiences and the emotional climate in which she or he was born and
lived. Subsequent experiences with foster carers and/or children’s homes or other
carers, will also have been looked at carefully, giving you an appreciation of the state in
which the child came to you so that you could plan appropriate parenting strategies.
It goes without saying, therefore, that your child’s experience of Education will need the
same scrutiny. Research reminds us that children thrive when:
• They have someone who is proud of their achievements
• Parents are supportive of education
• They have access to books
• They have somewhere to do their homework
• They have access to After School Clubs where they can achieve nonacademically
• They have an adult to talk to, both at school and at home, who understands their
position.
In May 2000, the Government issued guidance on the Education of Children and Young
People in Public Care. It is supported by DH Circular LAC(2000)13.
The guidance seeks to address the serious underachievement of children in public care,
and its purpose is to bring their attainment closer to that of their peers.
Children in public care may have had a number of changes in placement and school
may also have been disrupted. In addition the child may have a disability and/or learning
disabilities. As a consequence, the child could be in need of extra or special help. They
may already be Statemented, which means that the child’s educational needs have been
identified by an Educational Psychologist and a Statement about these needs has been
drawn up. Children with a Statement of Special Educational Needs are sometimes
entitled to receive assistance from a Learning Support Worker (until recently called a
Non-teaching Assistant) for a specified number of hours a week.
Integration into the new school
You may not have a choice about where you send your child to school, but if you do, it
always helps to make an appointment to see the Head Teacher to discuss your child. At
this stage you may not know the child sufficiently well to make a judgement about which
school to go for, but there are a few practical things you could explore at this stage.
It can be helpful to ask the Head Teacher to anticipate your child’s arrival by discussing
an Integration Plan. Your child may not have had a good experience of school in the
past, may have been bullied or, having enjoyed herself there, finds that she has yet
another move to contend with. The timing of her introduction into school is an important
factor to her settling down. The beginning of an academic year is obviously the best
option, when there may be other new children starting. Your child will stand out from the
crowd because she is new, because she may have a different regional accent to the
other children, she may be from a different culture and race, she may be small for her
age etc. These may seem minor things to adults, but they can cause children a great
deal of anxiety if not properly managed.
An Integration Plan should help to anticipate and intercept potential difficulties. Your
child should have a tour of the school, meet the Class Teacher and if possible, join in
some inter curricular activities to build up a friendship group. If she has special needs
and will have a Learning Support Worker, then she will need to meet that person too.
Some secondary schools have a ‘Buddy System’ where a friend is assigned to a new
pupil whose role it is to foster relationships with the new child’s peer group.
It will be helpful to find out if the school has an anti-bullying strategy, the name of the
person responsible for its implementation and how it works. The School should have a
leaflet listing the activities and various support systems that will benefit your child.
Simple things like a photograph of the school, and a photograph of the Teacher and the
Learning Support Teacher (if there is to be one) have been found to be helpful to
children who have had many changes in their lives. Anything that can be done to
relieve uncertainty and anxiety should help to smooth your child’s entry into this new and
scary part of her life. Above all, ease your child in gently.
Further information
You may be interested in visiting the Department of Education Website parent’s page at:
http://www.dfes.gov.uk/parentsgateway/index.shtml which will give you more
information.
‘Guidance on the Education of Children and Young People in Care’ is available on the
internet at www.dfee.gov.uk/incare.
Further information on the Quality Protects programme is available at
www.doh.gov.uk/qualityprotects/index.htm
Mcamd12.03.02

“It’s all right our doctor has done a medical”

Post Adoption Support by Health
Dr Mary Mather
Consultant Paediatrician

Adoption 1300 BC
On opening it, she looked, and lo, there was a baby boy, crying! She was moved with pity for him and said, "It is one of the Hebrew's children."
(Ex Exodus odus 2:5 5-6)
Moses saved from the water Palazzi Pontifici Pontifici, Vatican, Raphael 1517

Medical History of Adoption
- From Egyptian papyrus to …
attachment theory.
- From basic physical examination to …
comprehensive holistic assessment of …
health but also …
developmental education, social and …
emotional needs.

British Adoption History
1926 First British Adoption Law
- to provide legal recognition and security for the adoptive families of babies born out of wedlock and orphans of the First World War
1930
- 4,000 recorded adoptions
1950
- 14,500 recorded adoptions
1968
- 27,000 the highest number of adoptions on record
1926 -1990
- 876,601 recorded adoptions in England & Wales
-all these adults in response to a standard medical history can only say:
“I’m sorry I don’t know I’m adopted”
- adoption was largely confined to baby adoption by infertile couples
- ‘perfect’ baby -white, healthy, normal
- ‘perfect’ couple -white, healthy, affluent, married
- older children and children with disabilities were considered ‘unfit’ to adopt
- confidentiality and secrecy were essential for both adopters and children
- the past, including medical history, was deleted
- many children were simply never told
- new birth certificate
- new medical records were started
- new NHS number (still applies)

The Role of the Doctor
- brief physical examination of the newborn
- often done after placement
- any child found to have problems
- labelled “unadoptable”
- adopters given little health information
- it was assumed that all would be well
- parallels with intercountry adoption

Adoption Present
1980 -2001
- very changed population
- older children
- rejected or abused by parents
- parents affected by mental illness / drugs
- physical or learning disability
- sibling groups
- minority ethnic backgrounds

Why Adoption Fails
Information not clear or realistic
- 36% positive
- 33% negative
- 13% mixed (Murch& Lowe 1999)
- expectations compared to reality
- anticipating the wrong problems
- being deliberately misled
- problems not recognised by agencies

The Future of Adoption Work in Health
- a different type of work

Adoption Greenwich 1999
100 consecutive children presented to adoption panel
- 31 normal
- 44 significant problems
- 25 multiple problems
- 57 abuse and neglect
- 15 ‘voluntarily relinquished’
- 13 mental health problems in parents
- 9 drug abuse in parents
- 2 abandoned babies
- 60 behaviour problems
- 10 / 38 school children achieving normally at school
- 22 / 62 pre-school had developmental delay
- 36 physical problems
* 9 asthma / eczema
* 6 failure to thrive
* 5 squints
* 4 hearing loss
* 4 microcephaly
* 3 motor co-ordination difficulties
* 2 foetal alcohol syndrome

A Neglected Paediatric Specialty?
New conditions found in 5 children
- 1 spastic quadriplegic CP
- 1 pulmonary stenosis
- 1 undescended testis
- 2 HIV / Hep B tests

The Future of Adoption Work in Health
- a different type of work
- a different type of doctor

Child Protection & Adoption
- get artificially separated but in practice interlinked
- abuse and neglect followed by a lifelong series of health and management issues
- information about the past is essential
- for the sake of the child professional partnership with adopters and birth parents is essential

Skills and Competencies
In-depth knowledge of
- child health & development
- consequences of child abuse & neglect
- consequences of poor attachment
- consequences of genetically inherited illness in birth parents
- implications of parental lifestyles involving drugs and alcohol

An ability to work as part of a team with good links with
- genetic services
- communicable disease services HIV, Hep B & C
- infertility services
- child psychiatrists
- child protection services
- developmental assessment centres
- education special needs services
- ability to give social workers and adopters clear advice
- post adoption support begins with a comprehensive adoption medical
- to know is to understand

Post Adoption Support begins with the Adoption Medical
- a very comprehensive medical
- assessment of physical, emotional and educational needs
- collation of medical records is time consuming
- liaison with other health professionals essential
- there are many sources of information in health!

A 5 year old can have
- a personal CHR
- immunisations on community database
- a school health record
- community vision, hearing checks
- child mental health record
- physiotherapy, SALT, portage records
- hospital record
- GP record

To Know is to Understand
- there is still no nationally agreed policy on how these multiple records should be handled
- most contain information about birth family
- most have previous names and addresses
- legal advice is conflicting
- new NHS number adds to the confusion

Post Adoption Support begins with the Adoption Medical
- all prospective adopters should be offered an opportunity to meet the medical advisor
- all adopters helped to meet health needs in new district
- liaison after placement with new health professionals is essential

Working with the Birth Family
- medical information is collected by social workers
- birth parents are often alienated
- concerns about confidentiality
- good practice to invite to adoption medical
- most are happy to attend
- all are willing to give health details

The Genetic Revolution
- excluding major genetic malformations …
* 5% population will have a genetically inherited medical condition by the age of 25
* this rises to 60% by the age of 60
- who owns genetic information in adopted children
- screening for genetic disease
- genes for criminality, addiction or mental health?
- tracing individuals and records
- storage of DNA

Life Saving Questions to ask your Parents
- alcoholism increases risk 300%
- asthma increases risk 30-50%
- anorexia and bulimia increases risk x11
- schizophrenia & manic depression x10
- genes identified for increased risk of:
Breast cancer
Ovarian cancer
Colon cancer
Hypercholesterolaemia
Kidney disease
Diabetes
Obesity
Longevity

To Know is to Understand
“ The background information we received was excellent and accurate. It helped up make an informed decision at the time of matching.
It influenced the way we dealt with the child after placement. We felt that we understood her better.”

“ The social worker did not have time to collect a medical history, then the mother disappeared. We found out after his first fit there was a family history of epilepsy. They apparently had no time to tell us he was dyslexic.
We feel so guilty, we wasted all those years of school.”

The Future of Adoption Work in Health
- a different type of doctor
- a different type of work
- needs time
- needs training

Health Support for Life
All adopted children
- will normally regain good physical health
- will show improved pattern of health
- will show improved school progress

All children adopted after infancy
- will have been damaged to some degree in the past
- will have a blue print for survival which becomes more entrenched with age
- will test adopters to the limit and beyond
- will have some degree of resilience
- can be successfully adopted

Health (and Education) Support for Life
- in supporting parents of traumatised children
- little research on what works
(apart from parental commitment)
- therapeutic work is generally unregulated
- a plethora of different therapists, therapies
- very few outcome studies

The Mental Health Maze
- trauma affects attachment and development
- parents become lost in a diagnostic maze
- passed from pillar to post
- often given several diagnoses
- often given conflicting explanations and advice

The Future of Adoption Work in Health
- a different type of doctor
- a different type of work
- needs time
- needs training
- primary or secondary care?
- will it be resourced?
- will there be a new specialty?

And Finally
Second chances are rare both in life and in medicine.
Adoption is a provenmeans of doing this for children.
There were fewer adoptions in England in 1996 than in 1926.
What will be the number in 2026?

The Primal Wound
Understanding the Adopted Child
By Nancy Newton-Verrier
ISBN 0-963 364 80 01 Gateway

Adopters on Adoption
By David Howe
Reflections on parenthood and children
BAAF 1996
ISBN 1-873868-32-4

Raising Adopted Children – practical advice for every adoptive parent
By Lois Ruskai Melina
ISBN 0-06-095717-4

Making Sense of Adoption – A Parents Guide
By Lois Ruskai Melina
ISBN 0-06-096319-0

A Child’s Journey Through Placement
By Vera Fahlberg
BAAF 1994

A theoretical and practical guide to understanding and dealing with common issues in adoption placements including attachment, helping children when they move, child development, common behaviour problems

Helping Children Cope with Separation and Loss
Claudia Jewett
Batsford/BAAF
A description of the stages of mourning and the behaviour that can be expected from children, and techniques for helping them through the grieving process

Parenting the Child Who Hurts – The First Steps
Caroline Archer
Published by Adoption UK

Next Steps in Parenting the Child who Hurts – Tykes and Teens
Caroline Archer
Published by Adoption UK

Talking About Adoption to Your Adopted Child
By Prue Chennells & Marjorie Morrison
BAAF

The Long Awaited Stork
By Ellen Sarashon Glazer
A guide to parenting after infertility
Lexington Books
ISBN 0-02-911814-x

Real Parents, Real Children
Holy Van Gulden and
Lisa Bartels-Rabb
Crossroad
ISBN 08245 1514-5

The Adoption Reader
Edited by S.Wadia-Ellis
Birth mothers, Adoptive Mothers and Adopted Daughters tell their stories
Seal Press
ISBN 1-878067-65-6

Half a Million Women
By Howe, Hinnings and Sawbridge
Published by Penguin 1992
ISBN 0-436-19155-5.

The Adoption Experience – families who give children a second chance
Ann Morris
Jessica Kingsley Publishers Ltd
ISBN 1 85302 783 9
BOOKS FOR CHILDREN ABOUT ADOPTION

Bye Bye Baby
By Janet and Allan Ahlberg
(about a baby looking for a mum and dad)
ISBN 0-7497-0624-4

Horace
By Holly Keller
(about a leopard adopted by tiger parents)
ISBN 0-688-11844-5
Adoption is for Always
By Linda Walvoord Girard (US)
ISBN 0-8075-0187-5 (suitable for school age children)

Lets Talk About It: Adoption
By Fred Rogers
ISBN 0-698-11625-9 (suitable for school age children)
Big Panda, Little Panda
By Joan Stimson
ISBN 0-590-55423-9 (suitable when adopting a younger sibling into the family)

How I was Adopted
By Joanna Cole
published by Mulberry Books
ISBN 0-688-17055-2

Why was I Adopted?
By Carole Livingstone
Angus and Roberts
ISBN 0-207-14404-4

Chester and Daisy Move On
A story about two bear cubs who are adopted
By Angela Lidster
BAAF
ISBN 1-873868-19-7

Nutmeg Gets Adopted
By Judith Foxon
Explores the reasons why children are adopted
BAAF
ISBN 1-873868-99-5
ME 11.01